How Long Did It Take You To Get Pregnant?

This was originally written on Tuesday, January 22, 2008

I am still low on energy. I don't think I'll take "activity" for granted after I'm pregnant. It's a blessing to be able to move around freely! It's depressing to have in your mind your old ways of doing things--and to try, but not be able to. I can understand the eldery and disabled now. A simple task like getting up off the couch takes a tremendous amount of energy. It's been at least a month since I've been able to carry laundry baskets (with clothes). Cleaning the house is equal to a marathon. We took down our tree and all of our Christmas decorations after the first weekend in January--but Joe was the one who did most of the work since I seriously felt incapable.

On Saturday I went scrapbooking with my friends Heather and Sara (which I've been doing since October at a store), and as I was walking to the parking lot carrying my bags, they slid off my shoulder. I did the "pull back up" move with my arm, but it didn't work and so I had to give my arm an extra jerk--bad idea--I felt a painful pull in my abdomen. Even though I knew it wasn't serious enough to affect the baby or push me into premature labor, I realized I can't push myself with anything or else I really can injure myself and/or my son. Needless to say, I consolidated when I got home and will only be carrying one bag from now on!

By the way, I never mentioned that a month ago I lost my balance and fell into my shower door. The fall left a huge gash on my abdomen and there's still a line, but fortunately that was the day before my big ultrasound and so I was reassured quickly that it didn't hurt my baby.

This morning is the first time in a while that I've been up before 10 to noon. I made a comment at scrapbooking how I've been sleeping 10-12 hrs lately and every mother who overheard said at the same time, "DO IT!" It will be years before I'll be able to do it again. . .maybe that's why my body isn't really giving me a choice on this matter--I'm resting up for years ahead!

I haven't had any of the six-month nausea in a week so I'm hoping that was just a two-week thing (and it was 1/4 as bad as the first trimester--whew).

Lately I've been losing/misplacing things which is a HUGE pet peeve of mine. Maybe it's because our house is a mess. I told Joe I feel our house is a reflection of me. It's been an absolute disaster this month :p Fortunately, I've been slowly cleaning and working on getting it back together, so hopefully I'll feel the same about me/my life soon.

Joe and I finished registering on Friday so that is one less thing to worry about. We bought the moon & stars theme bedding set, so we can start decorating the nursery this weekend :-)

L.J. (we decided on James as Logan's middle name) is still moving around constantly. Every now and then I won't feel anything--but I'm always reassured within five minutes. I much prefer to be reassured this way rather than the first trimester with the all-day sickness (the only good part about that was that I always knew I was still pregnant and things were progressing well).

I forgot to mention that Joe's reaction was "weird!" the two times he has felt L.J. kick, haha! He says it's freaky--he can't imagine something alive and kicking him from the inside. I told him it often just feels like a twitch/spasm in my stomach. But yeah, I never could have imagined it before, either!

L.J. feels so low sometimes, it's like he's about to fall out (there's so much pressure). I made the comment that I think he'll just pop out easily during labor. . .Joe was like, "Can I get that writing?" Yeah, probably not :p

Joe says you can't tell I'm pregnant from the back, but this past week I've been able to definitely tell from the front (before, when I'd look at myself naked in the mirror my waist was still there. . .now it's not, lol. It feels weird when I put my hands on my hips--there's no indentation now). I'm not the cute basketball girl (you know, the pregnant woman who looks the same except for a perfect ball in front)--I'm carrying my weight all over.

Joe has somehow gained six pounds during my pregnancy, which is funny because he's been the exact same weight since our junior year of college (after he stopped lifting weights). He's one of those lucky people who can eat anything he wants and still look like he's working out every day. Granted, he's never had a very big appetite and it didn't seem like he'd been eating larger amounts lately. But studies have shown that most all husbands gain weight, too, while their wives are pregnant! Isn't that crazy? It must be a subconscious thing. Like, maybe I really am eating a lot more and he's used to eating in porportion to me and so he's eating more, too, without us noticing. . .???? Funny.
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This was originally written on Monday, January 28, 2008

This Friday will mark my 26th week of pregnancy. That is only four weeks before my mom had me--WOW. Sadly, the 26th week was when my cousin delivered her baby and lost him three days later. His real due date was this very past weekend. Please keep her in your prayers during this especially hard month.

Joe & I start our childbirth classes this Thursday. It seems unreal--another step toward L.J.'s arrival!

We started decorating our nursery on Saturday which was really exciting. Joe set up the crib & changing table, and we put the moon & stars bedding set together. It looks so nice--we love it!!!!

My back has been hurting pretty bad, and for some reason when I sit too long the top of my stomach becomes numb. I'm also peeing several times an hour--but at least there's still no nausea these days. . .and my sniffling is 99% gone. Also, I've found several of the items I'd lost, so I'm hoping that's a good sign (although there are five things still missing). That's probably due to me finally getting our house cleaned (with the help of Joe) by Saturday morning (Jake & Melissa came over and we went out to Wheatfields for a breakfast/lunch). Hopefully we can keep it this way for a while, especially since my mom & stepdad are visiting this Sat & Sun.

My only other plans include my mom throwing me a shower on March 1st, and Heather from Omaha is throwing me one with Lisa and the three Sara(h)s the Sun. before (2/24). It seems like just yesterday I was having a bridal shower--but that will be exactly five years from the day of my mom's!

From now on, on my blogiste, I'm going to try to topic in order of a woman's pregnancy. For example, today's will be about getting pregnant.

A friend of mine went off the pill in June, and when she hadn't conceived by August or September she started using the ovulation predictor kit. She expressed her disappointment to me recently about it not happening yet. It reminded me of how I felt last year.

Looking back, I see how strange the whole conception process is. Like, I went off the pill in Feb. 2004--not because I wanted to get pregnant, but because I'd had horrible side effects all year (despite even switching to one with a lower hormone dose). For about a year Joe and I were super careful. But, we got lazy and for the next couple of years we'd only use protection during my mid-month week.

Once I started tracking my cycle by taking my temperature, in February 2007, I realized how lucky we'd been not to get pregnant before we'd wanted to! My periods have never been regular and I realized I'd often been off on what were my most likely days to get pregnant. Our plan wasn't to purposely start trying to concieve until April (it's recommended to start tracking your fertility a couple of months prior to trying), but because of this realization, we decided to make March our first month of having unprotected sex during all weeks. After three months of this I began to wonder if we had some type of fertility issue. How could we have played russion roulette and not have conceived--when you hear about people all of the time having unprotected sex once and getting pregnant?!

So that's when I started using the ovulation predictor test. I was relieved that it showed positive (indicating that I was releasing an egg every month), but then was stunned when I didn't get pregnant in June or July. I still don't have an explanation. We did nothing different in August--the month I did conceive. (So even though in our minds we started trying in March, I consider pregnancy to have taken us three months since the months prior to August we didn't do it at the correct time.)

It is proof that if a couple doesn't have a fertility issue, it could just be as simple as "timing is everything." When you consider that (for a couple in their mid-upper twenties) the sperm and egg only have a 25% chance of meeting every month when no environmental factors get in the way (i.e. stress, viruses, etc.) then it's not really that surprising that it would take a few months for most couples. We're a society who wants quick results, but just like with everything in life, most things happen based on timing. That's why doctors don't want to test couples for fertility problems until after they've been trying for at least a year. More often than not, that's simply how long it takes. If you got pregnant on your first try then you are rare! (Tidbit: The month you go off the pill you are the most fertile you will ever be, however all doctors agree you should wait three months before you try to conceive, for your hormones to return to normal in order to prevent miscarriage or birth defects--as they are also the most likely during those first three months off the pill.)

That may be why the "first try" stories are the ones we hear about more, giving a false impression, because people are more likely to announce it as if they are extra fertile or something. In reality, most people are about equal (there's only two days a month women can get pregnant)--it's just that timing on when this happens (everything lining up) is different for everyone. (Also, many times people think their first pregnancy was their first try, when in all actuality there might have been a number of unplanned misses before.)

So, if you're in the same boat as my friend, as hard as it is not to get worked up about it--try to relax. That actually may be why I got pregnant when I did--because that particular month I'd given up! There was no more pressure because we were moving that month and had decided to wait to start trying again until 2008. I simply did the ovulation predictor kit for my third time as a last-minute decision one random day. . .and here I am five months later with a bun in the oven! :-)

Talk to ya again tomorrow!

We've Started The Nursery!

This was originally written on Tuesday, January 15, 2008:

It's been over two weeks since I last blogged and that's, unfortunately, because things haven't been the greatest.

To sum everything up, once we came back from our Christmas travels I couldn't seem to do anything. I thought I had chronic fatigue syndrome or something--I couldn't get off the couch.

My energy has continued to take a nosedive as I also seem to need 10-12 hours of sleep each night!!! (For the month of December I was only sleeping about 6, and was very active during the day.) To make matters worse, I started feeling nauseated again. I thought maybe I was just run down after the busy holiday season. . .until I read that many women who experience severe all-day sickness during the first trimester sometimes experience it again around the sixth month. I couldn't believe it! Was one good month (December) all I was going to get during this pregnancy?

Thankfully, things have improved somewhat. I still don't have the energy I had last month, but the moments of nausea are infrequent, so I've been able to handle that A LOT better than the first trimester. On the downside, I have the major back pain again which makes for a lot of discomfort throughout the day--especially during my sleep because it's worse when I lay down. But, my sinuses are getting better (however they're not back to normal yet). Lately, my mood has been added to the mix.

Despite my cousin's baby's death when I was 12 weeks, the severe sickness until my 16th week, the shooting in Omaha when I was 17 weeks pregnant, and my birthday in the ER at 20 weeks--I'd actually managed not to be depressed while pregnant. I was upset at the time of those events, but then I was able to calm myself down and the rest of the time my mood has actually felt more stable than before I was pregnant!

But this month I feel very overwhelmed with all that there is to do, as my due date seemed really far away up until the new year; now (I'm almost 24 wks) I realize I'm getting close to my third trimester! It's not like most things in life that have a "deadline"--our son doesn't have to wait until May to arrive! Hopefully he won't be a preemie (especially after what happened to my cousin--I am two weeks away from when her baby died), but I guess since I was two months premature myself I know that it's not impossible.

So, Joe & I signed up for our childbirth classes which will be from January 31st-March 9th. We are really looking forward to them. They'll be at Bergan Mercy Hospital. (My friend Melissa who is a nurse at a different hospital recommended it because it's the #1 hospital in our area for births, and more doctors & nurses choose to have their babies there, even if they work at other hospitals.) They do a one-day breastfeeding class and a one-day new parent class which are both in February.

This past weekend we registered at Babies R Us which was fun (more exciting than our wedding registry that had Joe laying on the beds at Bed, Bath & Beyond because it was so exhausting for us, haha). We still have some additional things to add, but we're about 80% done. Best of all, we bought the first two items for the nursery: a crib and changing table!!!

It was quite the ordeal. After going to every crib store in our vacinity, we narrowed our choice to two stores. All week we went over the pros and cons of our favorite cribs at each of these places, and decided that since they were all lifetime cribs (meaning they convert to a toddler bed and then adult bed) hopefully whichever one we chose would end up lasting at least 18 years. Therefore, it seemed okay to not pick the cheapest (like we normally do with things). Even though our favorite crib was honey-colored, opposed to all white (which is what we had planned for our son's room), we were really passionate & in love with it and decided we'd even change our color scheme for it.

However, we were told that the crib had been discontinued so all we could get was their floor model. Unfortunately, there were a lot of knicks in it and there was no way to camoflauge them. We were bummed, but then went to our second choice. It was the same price--and white. But, we were not having good luck that day. It was the same situation: the crib had been discontinued and all they had was the floor model.

The only other crib we liked there was the most expensive. But, I had a coupon for $30 off and they also told us that if we bought the matching changing table (w/ four drawers under it) we'd get another $100 off. Therefore, it turned out to be the best deal. It was also the most similar to our first crib choice (honey colored)--it just had more character which actually made it look fancier, and after really comparing them closely we realized the last one was the best one out of all the cribs we'd looked at!

Even though we'd originally planned on white because of our doors, trim, and windows, we thought their honey color was beautiful--and so that's what we bought! We are really happy with the way things turned out. We like that it's tall in front (safe) but it flips down (for short mothers like me) rather than slides down. We've also selected the bedding/theme for our son's room (moon & stars)--however, we haven't bought the items at Babies R Us yet. Melissa (who we went to dinner with on Sunday to a really good BBQ restaurant in Elkhorn with her husband and two neighbors) said that Burlington Coat Factory has a baby depot, too, with lots of ideas for themes. A good thing about the theme is that we can easily use everything for if we have a girl next. However, we'll probably emphasize the color blue this time. (To see a picture of our crib and theme, click on this future post I wrote in March 2008: For Me, Third Trimester Is The Best. For our chair and dresser, see this future post: Preparing To Breastfeed.)

As for the little guy, I had my most recent doctor's appointment on January 3rd and she was talking (again) about how active he was and so I asked her straight out if he's more active than most babies and she answered, "YES!" We were like, "Is that good or bad?" She said that health-wise it's good, but to prepare ourselves for a wild child around the house!!! We had to laugh, as Joe and I are definitely not high-energy people so we have no idea where he gets it. This could be interesting. . .:p I made a comment that I thought my baby must kick while he's sleeping since I feel him every hour and my doctor said, "Or maybe he doesn't sleep!" Gr-ea-t. :/

Joe was finally able to feel him last week so that was exciting. In the past whenever I'd have Joe put his hand on my abdomen the baby would stop moving! It reminded me of hiccuping--when you have the hiccups if you try and let someone know before your next hiccup, the hiccups usually stop! It's like being prepared/concentrating puts an end to them. But, last week the baby was moving a lot while Joe & I were watching TV on the couch, so I thought there was a good chance. Sure enough, there was a forceful jab! (It's definitely not the gentle "petting" anymore, but it's still all good and not painful or uncomfortable. . .although, every now and then it will be more powerful and will surprise me to the point of me saying "owe!") Joe was able to feel it again last night.

On Sunday we went to church and, as I was looking down, I saw a kick through my shirt! I haven't been able to see anything since, though, because my boobs are so big and are in the way. Also, I can only see the top of my stomach because it's so big, too--shaving my legs has become a very difficult experience! So has turning from one side to the other while sleeping (although, fortunately, I can still sleep on my stomach so that helps a little.) I can't reach my toes at all, so I'm thinking I may have to get a pedicure for the first time.

I guess it's no wonder that I'm so exhausted and have so many of these hormonal symptoms because my son is obviously using a lot of energy. For all babies, this week (24) is a major growth spurt. They double in size! Speaking of which, my weight has suddenly skyrocketed. I'm at 19 pounds gained! I'm only allowed to gain one more pound the rest of this month because I basically doubled the amount I was supposed to gain between December and January. I haven't been doing anything differently, so this has added to my "down" feelings. My doctor said I'm still fine, but just try to watch it during these last three-and-a-half months.

Unfortunately, I can't really exercise anymore because my body is so sore and moves like a 90-year-old's so I'm sure that doesn't help. (Just walking around at a snail's pace shopping for two hours makes my stomach cramp up and my back throb. I won't be surprised if I'm one of those women on bedrest the last couple of months.) Needless to say, I'm still looking forward to getting myself back physically.

This week I saw a People headline from Halle Berry: "I wish I could be pregnant forever." HUH?! Just days later I saw one from actress Jessica Alba (who is expecting a few weeks after me): "Being pregnant is awesome, it's the best time ever." No wonder I had false expectations!!! But, everyone has their cross to bear, so like I said in my "Started Showing At 16.5 Weeks" post, I am fine with mine being pregnancy (which is temporary) rather than something long-term.

Last night I had a dream I gave birth early and so I wasn't able to see my baby for awhile because he was in a special place in the hospital and then when I finally did, I saw that he was a yorkie poo and I was disappointed because I'd wanted a maltipoo.

WEIRD.

Anyway, there have been no negative repercussions from the foot-glass incident. Also, I told my doctor about it and she said the tetanus shot was probably fine, and I trust her a lot more than that resident or whoever my hospital doc was, so that whole experience is in the past.

I did decide to start looking for a pediatrician, though, who is okay with delaying the regular baby vaccinations a little bit, so Joe & I are going to meet with one later this month and if we like him than that's where we'll take our son. As I mentioned in my last post, I have been doing a lot of research on this controversial subject. What some parents are doing so as to "compromise" (still vaccinate but just not immediately so as to avoid brain disorders, autism, and immune disorders) is not give their children shots until their brains and immune systems are stronger. Joe & I have decided this is what we're going to do since the chance of contracting one of the viruses before then is slim--but we don't feel comfortable not giving any vaccines at all. (Here is an article that explains more.)

Hope everyone is having a good 2008, so far!