Morning Sickness--No, All-Day Sickness!

This was originally written on Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The past four weeks have been the sickest weeks of my life. In fact, within a day or two of my last post, I entered the worst week of my pregnancy. I wasn't able to get out of bed at all during weeks 8 & 9. It was so awful, I spent a couple of days in tears, praying to God to please relieve my sickness. I also listened to soothing music and practiced relaxation exercises and positive visualization (imagining the sickness leaving my body). It helped. . .although I wasn't cured. I had some better days after that (I've been able to go to the grocery store once since then but not any more than that because I was constantly worried I was going to throw up w/out making it to the restroom.) However, for every good day, I seem to have many more bad days that follow.

For example, last week I was so sure I was finally done with the sickness. I had four completely nausea-free days in a row (a record for the past six weeks). So, my stepgrandparents came over to see our new house on Saturday, but although it was a fairly relaxing weekend (all we did was visit the model homes in our area, go out to eat, and then play cards before going to bed), I had a terrible night's sleep. I was so uncomfortable with both a headache and severe nausea. When I woke up on Sunday morning, I threw up for the first time in nine days. (I've thrown up eight times over the past six weeks which is miserable, but not as miserable as the 24/7 nausea.) I continued to be nauseated all day, as well as on Monday and Tuesday.

This morning I am feeling better, although still vulnerable. Aside from the sickness, though, my pregnancy is still going well. I had my appointment with the nurse on October 8th and she did a ton of tests, all which came back good. She also gave me an overview of everything and some gifts.

Right now I'm in the not-so-fun stage where you just feel bloated/fat rather than pregnant. All of my clothes are now too tight, but maternity clothes make me look a lot bigger than I am. Still, I knew I needed something for the day (probably soon) when I can't get anything on. So, last Friday, Joe went with me to the mall to buy a few items. I bought two tops that will work for this stage and give me room to grow, as well as one regular shirt & pair of jeans just in a bigger size. Joe joked that I can save money and just wear his jeans rather than buy in the future. He tossed me a pair and told me to try them on. I did, assuming they'd be all big & baggy.

Um, no, they fit. In fact, I tried on all of his jeans and two pairs were snug! My mouth dropped open and I was like, "we wear the same size now?!" I then told him to see how far he could get my new pair of jeans on. Sure enough, they totally fit him. Yeah, with thirty pounds as being the recommended amount for nine months, it's inevitable I'm going to be weighing more than him in no time.

Pregnancy sure is an experience! Don't get me wrong, I'm still excited and appreciative of being able to have this opportunity to have a biological child. . .but I can't say pregnancy is on my top list of life's enjoyable experiences like it is for some women. It hasn't been pleasant even on my best days--aside from the moment I saw the ultrasound. Until now, Joe and I had planned to have our two children so they'd be exactly two years apart. I've decided it'll be more like four years apart because my body is going to need a break (and I haven't even gotten to the labor yet)! I told Joe that I don't care if he's going with me, but after the baby is 9 mos. old I'm taking a vacation to a beach!!!

At least Joe has been wonderful to me during this time. He even called me a "real trooper" yesterday and has been commenting about how strong I am--that is a big deal because Joe isn't easily impressed by people! But he said he could never think I was weak.

Fortunately, everyone says the second trimester is much better. Not only does the nausea usually go away, but you get a surge of energy, and rather than feel depressed you feel super happy. Plus, next month is pretty special as far as that's when women usually feel the baby move/kick, people can see the baby bump, and you can find out the sex! These are the things that keep me going, as well as picturing my little boy/girl and preparing/reading about parenthood.

I'm glad that I'm not alone. Jenny McCarthy wrote a book about her pregnancy called Belly Laughs that could have been written about ME! Even though it contains bad language, I'm closing this blog with my favorite excerpt. . . .

As anyone who has ever endured it knows, the term 'morning sickness' is bullshit. Morning has very little to do with it.

For me, it started in the morning and went straight through the night. The label 'morning' must have been thought up by a man who thought it was all in our heads and hoped that limiting the definition would make us all shut up by noon.

Well, I don't think so, buddy! I say, come on over to my house around 5 pm so I can heave on you.

Some women I know have had this worse than others. Some have puked every fifteen minutes all day long and others just a few times a day.

I consider myself to have had it even harder than the pukers. I was in a constant state of queasiness that would cause me to gag or dry-heave. You know that second before you throw up where your mouth gets really watery and you start to sweat and you do that horrible run to the bathroom hoping to just get it out so you don't have to feel that anymore?

That was me.....ALL DAY. I was stuck in that in-between state where nothing would come out. I would just stare at the toilet sweating and praying to the procelain God not to let me dwell any longer in puke purgatory. I would have sold my soul for one of two options: Either let me puke or let me feel better.

Going to the grocery store was a freakin' nightmare. I was terrified every time I had to go.

Celebrity life isn't all personal assistants and glamour, let me tell you. Oh yes, I do my own shopping. I would walk in pale and sweaty with my little list in my hand and run through the aisles. To me, the meat counter smelled like dead animals that had been left in the sun for a year. I would cringe and hold my sleeve up to my nose as I passed. Everything in that store disguested me. Strangers gawked at me as they saw me gagging in Aisle 3 holding up some cheese.

Its' hard having these symptoms in public when you don't look pregnant. If I were nine months along they would look at me like "oh look, poor little pregnant lady doesn't feel so good." Instead they looked at me as if to say,"Don't bulimics puke AFTER they eat?"

Television food commercials killed me. I loved them for cravings later on, but during this early stage I turned green when I saw someone eat a greasy cheeseburger or some Hamburger Helper.

You'd think with all this aversion to food that I would lose weight during this period.....nope. Instead I gained a lot. Probably because the only thing that I could get down was an entire loaf of white bread every day. As I would later find out from asking around the people who do lose weight during "morning sickness" eventually catch up to us fat pregnant women later. Fair's fair.

So if you succumb to becoming best friends with your toilet, don't fret. Just remember you're not alone. All women are right there with ya holding your hair up, cheering you on. For most of us, it all passes in a few long months. The max is nine months, I promise.